How Long to Break a Habit or Addiction? Tips & Steps

Let's cut right to the chase and get clear on two things:

1. The answer is between 18 and 254 days, but I don't think you're asking the right question. The question you want to be asking is, "How do I break a habit or addiction in the shortest amount of time?" That's what this blog post is about.

2. Let's get clear on what constitutes a habit because of course, we all have bad habits. In this blog, I'm referring to over-eating, smoking, drug addiction, and biting your nails, but we are also talking about WORRY, ANGER, and RUMINATIONS as potentially bad habits, too.

I know; my mind was blown, too. 

Regardless of what unhealthy habit you're thinking of, let's start our recovery journey by looking at some fascinating scientific research. 

What Makes A Habit Or Addiction?

Hands up if you have NEVER had the experience of your mind wandering when you're trying to concentrate and finish up doing your notes and suddenly you're on youtube or tiktok?

Of course, no one should be raising their hands because we are fighting against a reward-based learning process that is deeply ingrained in the primitive parts of our brains. We've known for ages that addictive behaviors like drug and alcohol addiction are not conscious decisions and have had ideas that these are unconscious desires that our waking minds don't have access to, and recent studies are confirming this.

This learning process that creates habits like being distracted by YouTube or TikTok is based on positive and negative reinforcement and is responsible for most of our harmful habits, according to Dr Jud Brewer. When we see or experience something that looks good, our brain tells us it's rewarding, and we should repeat the behavior. that is positive reinforcement. 

This serves as an evolutionary advantage; for example, when we eat food, especially sugary food like fruit, our brain sends a signal that says, "Remember what you're eating and where you found it." This creates a context-dependent memory and reinforces the behavior of eating. Subsequently, we learned that apples and oranges were good and knew to look for them when we were hunter-gatherers.

Over time, our brains use this reward-based learning process for more than survival. We learn that eating good when we feel bad can make us feel better. We may start smoking to be cool or to fit in with a certain group, which also feels good in a very different way. However, each time we engage in these behaviors, our brain activity reinforces the habit, and it becomes harder to break. The 'reward' is the positive reinforcement and as a result this circuit gets hardwired into our minds deep in the back of our brain. Think about  brushing your teeth or riding a bike - these are all habits of a certain variety that we can do on autopilot. It's really efficient for us not to have to remember how to brush our teeth twice a day, or recall riding a bike each time we get on one; habits generally save us from having to relearn things and are about being efficient. 

See food > eat food > feel good > repeat.

Open TikTok > Get a like > Feel good > repeat

Feel awkward >  smoke cigarette > feel less awkward > repeat

Trigger > behavior > reward > repeat.

How Do Habits Work In Our Minds?

The efficiency our brains use to create a habit is a double-edged sword, though because it means bad habits are really easy to form and turn into habitual behavior if there are no negative consequences and there's a great reward.

For example, next time we feel sad or lonely, our brain reminds us that food or smoking sometimes makes us feel better, and we might eat some of those delicious Reeses Pieces or ice cream that are in my freezer, and I'll get the 'ping' of a reward because they are just delicious. But now I have managed to change the trigger, and I run the risk of this becoming a new autopilot behavior. You can see how easy it is for me move away from the trigger of feeling hungry or to the trigger being sad or lonely. Now everytime I feel a bit sad, I'll be reaching for those frozen Reeces Pieces. 

Each time we do this, we get a reward, which gets reinforced and it becomes engrained as other new patterns of behavior that feel good to us, and Reeces Pieces just another of the new automatic responses I'll have to try and find treatment options for!

We are using the same brain processes, but we've gone from learning to survive and reeling that fruit is good to literally killing ourselves with these habits. Obesity and smoking are among the leading preventable causes of morbidity and mortality in the world.

If you were to be stuck in any of these unhealthy habits, perhaps overeating or smoking, you will have undoubtedly tried to force yourself to break it by willing yourself to not engage in it. If you can relate to this, you've been using the brain's prefrontal cortex, which is responsible for cognitive control. This part of the brain helps us in making rational decisions, and here's the bad news: is also the first to go offline when we're stressed.

That's why, under stress, we revert to our habits which are in a deeper part of our mammalian brain. Autopilot behaviors are not stored in the same regardless of our minds as our willpower so you often can't think your way out of these habits, even if you have a solid knowledge of the harm they are inflicting. This is a crucial factor in understanding why so many people are unable to create behavior change using will-power alone. 

New Approaches To Breaking Habits

A new approach to breaking habits is being spearheaded by Dr Jud Brewer, who is using an approach to breaking habits that consider that we have two parts of our minds that are not cooperating with each other. He's creating a professional treatment for breaking habits that is looking at everything from smoking to anger, and I would not be surprised if one day his work becomes the gold standard of treatment for mental health issues related to habits. 

His idea is to poison the reward, making the pay-off less attractive or less ‘fun', which ruins the trigger-behavior-reward cycle. In theory and there's actually scientific evidence, he is showing signs that this approach is a great way to help us break unwanted habits.

His research is based on a mindfulness approach to addictive behavior and habits. Rather than forcing ourselves to stop, he suggests to become curiously aware of what we're doing when we engage in these habits in our everyday life. It's about observing our actions, sensations and feelings as we're in the middle of an existing habit, understanding the triggers, and noticing the sensations and feelings involved.

Smoking for example, if you pay attention next time you light up a cigarette (which I hope you do not) you might notice that it is actually utterly revolting, It tastes of chemicals and dried feet and nastiness. There's nothing pleasurable about it when you really focus mindfully on the act of smoking.

In Dr. Brewer's studies, he initially encourages smokers to continue smoking, but asks them to really pay attention to the sensations in a mindful way. Many participants, through this heightened awareness, realized over the long term just how unpleasant aspects of smoking were that they had been ignoring. With enough time, this realization often led to a natural and profound shift in their behavior. The key here is the shift from knowing that smoking is bad to the wisdom of understanding that it's not a pleasant act. 

This direct experience can break the spell of the habit and is "poisoning the payoff." All of a sudden the trigger-behavior-reward loop is interrupted because that reward is no longer as ‘loud' or delicious as it once was, as we are noticing the more disgusting sensations, tastes and smells that go on when you smoke in the first place.

It starts with becoming more aware of our actions and the triggers that lead to our habits. Next time you reach for that extra cookie or cigarette, pause for a moment. Be curious. Ask yourself, what's happening in your body and mind at that moment? This simple act of curiosity can be a great step or the first step in breaking the habit loop.

In essence, this mindfulness approach isn't about drastic changes overnight we can't go see a plastic surgeon and have the habit removed. Long-term recovery is more of a gradual process of becoming more aware of being on autopilot.  It's about seeing clearly the consequences of our actions and naturally letting go of old habits. Clearly, this will vary with the length of time and severity of the addiction we are trying to change, but it is a great place to start.  As we practice mindfulness, we learn to step out of our fear-based reactions and into a state of being that is more in tune with our experiences, moment by moment. The research shows that our chances of success might have higher success rates than some other addiction recovery programs.

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How to help clients break habits: 

With this information in mind, helping a client break habits is not just about discussing them or telling them why they ought to, but delving into the 'why' and 'how' of their formation. By integrating Dr. Brewer's approach, you can guide your clients to map out their habit loops - identifying the triggers, the behaviors, and the rewards. This mapping is more than an exercise; it's a journey into self-awareness, helping clients to see the unseen and acknowledge the subconscious drivers of their actions.

Habits and Addictions - Dr Brewer's Future Research

In my private practice, I deal with clients who are dealing with excessive anger or excessive worry, more than I am working with people who want to stop smoking. What I am most excited about is the idea of worry and anger being habits, each with a trigger, a behavior and a reward. Applying the same understanding of the habit of smoking to these mental behaviors is a fascinating

Think about what the pay off is for a client experiencing huge amounts of WORRY. It's a little trickier, but worry gives us the illusion of control and power, which is MUCH better than living in uncertainty or fear. The good news for therapists is that we can guide clients to see that worry really doesn't feel good, it's a heaviness and weight that is not pleasant at all. 

I used this technique with a client who was ANGRY all the time, and we saw that this anger what a habit that was a coping mechanism to cover up feelings of powerlessness or uncertainty. 

By integrating Dr. Brewer's approach, you can guide your clients to map out their habit loops - identifying the triggers, the behaviors, and the rewards. This mapping is more than an exercise; it's a journey into self-awareness, helping clients to see the unseen and acknowledge the subconscious drivers of their actions.

Frequently Asked Questions:

How long does it take to form a new habit

There are no definitive answers, but one study suggests between 18 and 254 days -check it out here

According to another study published in the European Journal of Social Psychology, it takes an average of 66 days before a new behavior becomes automatic and a habit is formed. However, the actual number of days can vary greatly depending on the behavior, the individual, and the circumstances How are habits formed: Modelling habit formation in the real world" by Lally, van Jaarsveld, Potts, and Wardle (2010) is: Lally, P., van Jaarsveld, C. H. M., Potts, H. W. W., & Wardle, J. (2010). How are habits formed: Modelling habit formation in the real world.

How do bad habits form?

Bad habits form because of the reward system in our brains. The brain is wired to seek out pleasure and avoid pain. When we engage in a behavior that brings pleasure or relief, our brains release dopamine - a feel-good chemical - which reinforces that behavior as a desirable one. Source: "The Biology and Psychology of Bad Habits" by James Clear. (https://jamesclear.com/how-to-break-a-bad-habit)

How can we break bad habits?

One way to kick bad habits is to actively replace unhealthy routines with new, healthy ones. Additionally, positive psychologist Shawn Achor suggests that you can break bad habits by putting obstacles in place that stop you from engaging in them. Changing your environment or routine can also be effective in breaking bad habits. Source: "The Happiness Advantage" by Shawn Achor. (https://www.amazon.com/Happiness-Advantage-Principles-Success-Performance/dp/0307591549)

Can you replace a bad habit?

Yes, some people find they can replace a bad habit with a healthier substitute. For example, someone trying to quit smoking may start chewing gum or eating healthy snacks as a substitute. However, this method may not work for everyone and may require finding a replacement that brings a similar reward or relief. Source: "How to Break Bad Habits" by Healthline. (https://www.healthline.com/health/how-to-break-a-bad-habit)

Is it true that you can never really "break" a bad habit?

According to some experts, it is difficult to completely eradicate a bad habit because the reward system in our brains can continue to reinforce it. However, through awareness and practicing self-control, people can learn to manage or overcome bad habits. Source: "Breaking Bad Habits" by Psychology Today. (https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/habits-not-hacks/201405/breaking-bad-habits)